look out for “number one.” We start using “my” when describing what is good about our marriage, and “your” when describing what is bad. We think our agenda within the relationship is the correct one, the one which should guide the marriage. As one wife complained, “When I married Mr. Right, I didn’t realize his middle name was ‘Always.’ ” The Apostle James tells us that our conflicts arise from the lusts and desires which are within us (James 4:1–2). Lusts and desires don’t have to refer to sexual